http://www.officialjesuschrist.com/ The life and times of a gun-toting, crack addicted Jesus Christ and friends. New comics every Tuesday and Thursday. en-us bitchslap-rss v1.0 dhetrick@gmail.com dhetrick@gmail.com http://www.officialjesuschrist.com/main.php?strip=506 Holy shit, I'm like, uh, a couple of days late, or something like that. Sorry. Things have just been really, really busy lately. So busy that I'm cutting the strips down to once a week. For how long? I dunno, but it's gonna be that way for awhile. Look for a new comic every Wednesday! See you kids next week! http://www.officialjesuschrist.com/main.php?strip=505 Whoa! What's that? A twist worthy of M. Night Shamalamadingdong. Or maybe that one time I got a twist ice cream cone: half chocolate and half Absolute slushie. It tastes like shit, but damn, it'll get ya hammered. Also, never punch nuns. The cops never understand, and the Vatican frowns on it, and then they make you pay for all those parking tickets you got when you moonlighted as a taxi driver last summer. With a gun! With a gun. Anyway, I'll see you kids on Thursday, yeah? Yeah. Enjoy! http://www.officialjesuschrist.com/main.php?strip=504 This is the only comic for this week, kids. Got something cool planned for later. Trust me, you'll like it. It's nothing like that time I got all those popsicle sticks and tried to shove them up your...I don't want to say. I mean, this is a nice, polite website, that never stoops to crude language or crass behaviour. That's right motherfucker: we're fucking awesome, and you know it. Anyway, I'll see you kids next week, yeah? Yeah. Enjoy! http://www.officialjesuschrist.com/main.php?strip=503 Hey there, kids. Sorry the comic's late. Like, a day late. I can tell you with all honesty that it has absolutely nothing to do with an alcoholic blackout. I mean, yeah, it might be some other kind of blackout, but it's not alcohol related. Cough syrup related? Perhaps. Probably not, that shit's getting expensive. Did you hear that they raised the MSRP of Robitussin Extreme Cough And Cold? It's hard to make ends meet, especially when one of the ends is all the way on the other side of the room and you're all whacked out on dextromethorphan hydrobromide. Anyway, that's that. I'll see you kids next week, yeah? Yeah. Enjoy! http://www.officialjesuschrist.com/main.php?strip=502 ...no, really. I need it. Like now. I understand, man, you gotta make a profit. But I've gotta eat a whole bunch of eels, right? And I don't even like eels. Except when they're on sushi, but we know that that's not the situation here. That's right: it's not a musclebound freakjob from New Jersey. It's also not sushi, at least, it hasn't been since the World War 2. Look, man, I'll cut you. Yes, it's a knife. I know it looks like a spoon, but I sharpened it by punching your mom in the face. And that's what makes the magic happen. It doesn't have anything to do with pornography, or even your mom! But that's how it works. I'll freaking cut you with my magic knife-spoon, I swear. Anyway, see you kids on Thursday, yeah? Yeah. Enjoy!